{"id":1879,"date":"2013-06-17T13:45:43","date_gmt":"2013-06-17T13:45:43","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.lymphoma.ca\/lesprit-de-peur\/"},"modified":"2013-06-17T13:45:43","modified_gmt":"2013-06-17T13:45:43","slug":"lesprit-de-peur","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lymphoma.ca\/fr\/lesprit-de-peur\/","title":{"rendered":"L\u2019esprit de peur"},"content":{"rendered":"

Mon concert gospel de No\u00ebl aura lieu ce week-end. En g\u00e9n\u00e9ral, \u00e7a ne m\u2019angoisse pas; je suis juste un peu plus excit\u00e9e qu\u2019en temps normal.
\n<\/p>\n

par Robin Harry<\/h3>\n
\n

Mon concert gospel de No\u00ebl aura lieu ce week-end. En g\u00e9n\u00e9ral, \u00e7a ne m\u2019angoisse pas; je suis juste un peu plus excit\u00e9e qu\u2019en temps normal. J\u2019aime chanter dans un ch\u0153ur, et je ne vois rien de mieux qu\u2019interpr\u00e9ter sur sc\u00e8ne des chants qui glorifient le Seigneur. C\u2019est l\u2019une de mes activit\u00e9s pr\u00e9f\u00e9r\u00e9es. Mais pour certaines raisons, je tremble de peur \u00e0 l\u2019id\u00e9e d\u2019y participer cette ann\u00e9e. <\/p>\n

1. Et si j\u2019\u00e9tais pourrie?
Normalement, je chante plut\u00f4t bien. Mais cela fait plus d\u2019un an que je n\u2019ai pas donn\u00e9 de r\u00e9cital avec le groupe. Bien s\u00fbr, nous avons TOUS pris une pause durant cette p\u00e9riode, mais je suis la seule \u00e0 avoir eu une intubation trach\u00e9ale, des traitements de radioth\u00e9rapie au thorax et du tissu cicatriciel dans la zone du m\u00e9diastin. Avant et apr\u00e8s mes traitements, j\u2019\u00e9tais par moments incapable de chanter. Je visais le si b\u00e9mol, mais en vain. Je chante BEAUCOUP mieux maintenant, m\u00eame s\u2019il y a encore mati\u00e8re \u00e0 am\u00e9lioration. Voil\u00e0 pourquoi j\u2019ai un peu moins confiance en moi. Juste un peu moins…<\/p>\n

2. Le cancer ou l\u2019\u00e9l\u00e9phant dans un magasin de porcelaine
Et voici ce qui me rend un peu plus craintive. Aux concerts, il y aura probablement beaucoup de monde que je n\u2019ai pas vu depuis mon cancer ou depuis que je suis devenue chauve et boursouffl\u00e9e. J\u2019ai tr\u00e8s h\u00e2te de revoir certaines personnes, par contre je redoute d\u2019en rencontrer d\u2019autres. Je ne sais pas exactement ce que je vais faire ni leur dire. Tous les \u00ab comment \u00e7a va? \u00bb, les regards fuyants et maladroits et les pauses o\u00f9 l\u2019on tente de trouver quelque chose \u00e0 dire \u00e0 quelqu\u2019un qui a le cancer \u2013 je ne peux pas dire que \u00e7a me tente vraiment. Mais il est possible que je m\u2019en fasse pour rien, n\u2019est-ce pas? <\/p>\n

3. La culpabilit\u00e9 du survivant
Il y a plusieurs ann\u00e9es, l\u2019une des membre de la chorale, St\u00e9phanie, est d\u00e9c\u00e9d\u00e9e d\u2019un lymphome durant la p\u00e9riode de No\u00ebl. J\u2019en ai d\u00e9j\u00e0 parl\u00e9 dans mon blogue. Sa vie et sa dignit\u00e9 devant l\u2019adversit\u00e9 ont \u00e9norm\u00e9ment influenc\u00e9 ma fa\u00e7on d\u2019affronter la maladie. Mais aujourd\u2019hui, surtout \u00e0 l\u2019approche du concert de No\u00ebl, je souffre du syndrome de culpabilit\u00e9 du survivant. J\u2019ai surv\u00e9cu au lymphome, et St\u00e9phanie, non. Elle est morte \u00e0 30 ans, l\u2019\u00e2ge de ma r\u00e9mission. En \u00e9crivant ces lignes, je ne sais pas comment je pourrai regarder sa famille et ses amis dans les yeux sans pouvoir leur expliquer pourquoi il en est ainsi. Je suis terrifi\u00e9e \u00e0 l\u2019id\u00e9e de les rencontrer.<\/p>\n

4. D\u00e9j\u00e0 vu
Le dernier concert que nous avons donn\u00e9 \u00e9tait le premier jour de ce qui sera le reste de ma vie. Je sais pourtant que le risque d\u2019avoir des douleurs \u00e0 la poitrine samedi matin est minime. Vraiment minime. C\u2019est ce que je dois continuer \u00e0 me r\u00e9p\u00e9ter. Minime…<\/p>\n

Je n\u2019aime pas \u00eatre anxieuse et j\u2019ai encore plus de r\u00e9ticence \u00e0 admettre mes craintes. Surtout ce type de craintes. Mais peut-\u00eatre que d\u2019en parler me soulagera. Le probl\u00e8me des peurs irrationnelles, c\u2019est qu\u2019elles sont irrationnelles. Je pourrais \u00e9voquer une dizaine de bonnes raisons de ne pas m\u2019en faire. Je finirai par me d\u00e9barrasser de toutes ces petites craintes, car je refuse de laisser la peur et l\u2019anxi\u00e9t\u00e9 m\u2019emp\u00eacher de faire ce qui doit \u00eatre fait. D\u2019ailleurs, Dieu n\u2019a pas mis en moi \u00ab l\u2019esprit de peur \u00bb; il m\u2019a donn\u00e9 \u00ab l\u2019esprit de force, d\u2019amour et de sagesse \u00bb. C\u2019est ce dont il est question dans nos chants. Il est peut-\u00eatre grand temps que je me mette \u00e0 y croire.<\/p>\n

Je vous raconterai ce qui s\u2019est pass\u00e9…<\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Mon concert gospel de No\u00ebl aura lieu ce week-end. En g\u00e9n\u00e9ral, \u00e7a ne m\u2019angoisse pas; je suis juste un peu plus excit\u00e9e qu\u2019en temps normal.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1605,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[15],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-1879","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-blogue"},"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nL\u2019esprit de peur - Lymphoma Canada<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.lymphoma.ca\/fr\/lesprit-de-peur\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"fr_FR\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"L\u2019esprit de peur - Lymphoma Canada\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Mon concert gospel de No\u00ebl aura lieu ce week-end. 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