Tomorrow morning I see my doctor to get the results of the all-important make-it-or-break-it PET scan.
By: Robin Harry
“So what’s the verdict?”
“Did you do your scans?”
“Oh my gosh, it’s tomorrow!!”
“It’s April…what’s the word?”
“Are you nervous?”
“When do you see your doctor?”
“Is there any news?”
Tomorrow morning I see my doctor to get the results of the all-important make-it-or-break-it PET scan. I tell you – if I wasn’t anxious before, I’m sure as hell anxious now! Phone calls, emails, questions, text messages…oh my goodness, it’s overwhelming. When I’m overwhelmed, I get anxious. and when I get anxious, I get slightly irritable and edgy. <sigh> Deep breaths, Robin, deep breaths…
The truth is I’m not really anxious for myself. While I’m obviously hoping that the results will be good and that I’m in remission, I’ll deal with whatever it is as I have in the past – with prayer, gratitude and faith. What I’m anxious about is all the anticipatory faces, all the people who are waiting to find out, the people who are even more anxious than I am. Parents, friends, colleagues. I really want to be able to tell them all some good news! I’m afraid of seeing the looks of disappointment on their faces, or hearing a litany of “I’m so sorry”s. I care that they care, and I don’t want to be the bearer of bad news…again.
So yes, I’m a little anxious. But at least it’s only for a few more hours…